What, you may be wondering at this moment, are these two pictures?
Well, I'll be happy to tell you.
A week ago I joined what is perhaps the closest thing to a sports team that I will ever join up with in my life–––a Dungeons and Dragons Guild.
Yes, you read that correctly. I will shortly be adventuring with a group of friends in imaginary lands as the elf cleric/archer Amel-Marduk. (For those who may be wondering where the name comes from, all you need to know that is that Amel-Marduk, "man of Marduk," was the son of Nebuchadnezzar II. I mean, why not name an imaginary character after an ancient Babylonian king?)
What skills do I posses to adventure through wondrous lands as Amel-Marduk?
Well, my elf cleric is a healer, a magician, a pretty damned good archer, and, above all, uses a seer stone to look for lost or hidden objects. That's how he made a living before he joined up with a rag-tag group of adventurers; he would be hired to find lost or stolen artifacts. (To answer your next question, yes, I got the idea of from Joseph Smith's youthful exploits with folk magic.)
I have, I believe, officially arrived at a new level of Nerdom.